Of med sch books and green-eyed monster

I bid a teary farewell to all my medical school books. I thought that perhaps Shamir who is preparing for his MCAT exams could use some good literature and prep books that I "lugged" back from the USA. When I was going through the books, my heart felt heavy. I looked at my scribblings, my notes, my mind maps, my flash cards etc. Gosh, I did put in so much effort for med school. Alas, I was disappointed when I was rejected last year and this year, my morale is so low that I'm not confident of acceptance. Parting with my books was very painful. I must really want to study medicine...
My heavy grew heavier with the low morale and throbbing headaches. The green-eyed monster emerged. I couldn't understand why I felt so jealous of a married woman who suddenly appeared and seemed rather friendly with a certain someone. How could I feel this way? I remember Shahih al Bukhari narrated - "Aishah: I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadijah (although) she died before he married me, for I often heard him mentioning her." Perhaps I'm like Aishah who had deep feelings towards the person she loved. Either I'm just a "fool to want you" or truly in love with one who doesn't seem to love me... God, pls grant me patience, guidance and strength. This old soul needs to take her worn heart far away...

About love and lovers

The minute I heard my first love story I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere.
They’re in each other all along.
~ Rumi

Purnama 2

My short film 'Potong Andam' will be screened at the Singapore Malay Film Society's Purnama 2.
Date: 12 October 2009 (Monday)
Time: 7.30 pm (seats are available on first come first served basis)
Venue: The Substation Theatre (there's a min $2 donation to the Substation at the door)
Programme: Screening of 5 short films + Q & A session
*Note: It's a R21 session and there'll be ushers at the entrance to check IDs.
http://www.potong-andam-the-film.com/

Bohemian night

I don't know why I was feeling blue and negative last night. Perhaps it was the gum surgery I went through on Thursday and the painkillers didn't help much... or the medical school applications staring at me, their preferred MCAT scores sticking out in BOLD or ...
So Erzwin & I hung out, watching 'Boiler Room' and strumming the guitar. Amidst trying to rationalise and making sense of things, we sung our favourite Mat Maintain songs. How I wish I had learned the violin then...
As per Guns N' Roses, "don't you cry tonight, there's a heaven above you..." Perhaps it's time the world sees a cold, un-emo Hidayah...

Let's Lepak!

I've my own blog column on Singapore International Foundation's Kopitiam website - http://www.singaporekopitiam.sg/

Called "Let's Lepak!" (Let's Chill!), the weekly blog gives insights on Malay culture and heritage and also showcases my musings. I also write articles under the "Places & Heritage" space.

It's "Chill out time culture vulture Hidayah Amin"... so shall we lepak?

Invasion of Indon women

Kak Waty & Yasmine from Fresh Meadows came to visit (one week after Steve & Din left) along with an entourage of warm and nice Indonesian aunts. Ahh.... how I miss staying with Kak Waty in New York. How Yasmine has grown! Tears rolled down our cheeks as talked about how we lost our loved ones last year - Pak Rurun to cancer and my mum to heart attack. May Allah place them among the blessed.

Lehigh brothers visit Singapore

Learning to fly
A view to a kill
@ Fish Spa!
What the fish!
Steve & Din came to visit in early August. What fun we had! Jalan2. Makan2. Cakap2. Gaduh2. *LOL...
Come to Singapore again lah! :)

The Eagle and the Wolf - Part 4

Prairie Rose weeps upon hearing the howling of the wolf which resonates through the canyon. O how sad the eagle must feel when she hears the message. O how miserable Mother Eagle would be if she too could hear the howling from the lands beyond. Prairie Rose whispers to Demon Wind, “Help her!”
The eagle feels weak, her eyes moist with tears. She flies aimlessly, her head hangs low. There's no point to be with one who doesn't want you. How her heart aches! Nothing else matters anymore; not that nest on the mountain top, not even that coveted honour as a messenger of prayers.
O wolf! Why such a drastic act? Why not run the distance with the eagle? Has the eagle not been a source of happiness? Is the eagle not worthy of devotion? Has the eagle not proven her unconditional love? For the first time, Demon Wind lets out a long sigh of disappointment.
The canyon is quiet that day. Demon Wind and Prairie Rose pray in silence. O eagle, lift your spirits and soar high in the blue sky. Soulmates are not for us to decide. O wolf, do you realize what you have let go?

Of Emak & Michael Jackson's passing

The recent death of Michael Jackson reminds me of Emak's passing. Both were sudden and unexpected.

"Verily, with ALLAH alone is the knowledge of the Hour. And HE sends down the rain, and HE knows what is in the wombs. And no soul knows what it will earn tomorrow, and no soul knows in what land it will die. Surely, ALLAH is All-Knowing, All-Aware." Quran 31:34

As we mourn and pray for the souls of our beloved, let's remind ourselves to live life to the fullest, to do good deeds and be kind to one another. After all, this world is but a transient stop. As per Michael Jackson's Heal the World, "If you cared enough for the living, make a little space to make a better place..."

Michael, may the truth be revealed.
Emak, I miss you terribly...